Emotional stuff

[exiledstar]

Would it be good to have a thread where we can just vent about emotional stuff? It's not necessarily writing related, but affects your writing?

It's really hard for me to write or paint when I feel like someone I care about isn't hearing me, or responding.
So there is somebody I care about who I tried to give a sincere compliment to. But the person has had a hard life and has a very guarded, skeptical nature, and he accepted the compliment politely but really coldly.
Then I felt like I had gone too far out on a limb by saying anything at all. But he won't talk about it further. I feel like I've been patted on the head and told to run along and play.
It's like being made invisible. Then I hurt myself more by telling myself that I'm being stupid and taking things way too personally. Other people who say nice things to me and I don't believe them.

Vicious circle: begun.

I shouldn't even care, but I do.

[ottabelle]

I think that's normal. We want to be and feel heard. It's hard but everyone will react differently to what you say, especially compliments. Give yourself time to be sad, but don't stay there. You don't have to. If someone doesn't want to believe your compliment you can't make them.
You aren't invisible, we see you.

[limebirdwriters]

Yes of course that's fine! We don't always have to talk about writing!

Oh no, that sounds that a horrible situation, but like Amber said, you can't make people believe something they don't want to. Have you trying talking to them about how it made you feel? You might have just got your wires crossed. I hope you feel better soon.

Bx

[exiledstar]

Thanks. I tried, but the person doesn't respond. I can't talk face to face with them so it's not possible to know if they're just busy, uninterested or whatever.

Normally something like this wouldn't bother me this much. But right now it really does.

[4amWriter]

Hi Exiled,

Have you tried to write about it in some way? For me, anything emotionally icky like that always gets in the way of the project I'm working on. It seeps into the novel or short story and what's worse is that it doesn't belong there and really messes me up.

So, what I find helps is to write about the emotional issue in a separate form, such as in a journal or a poem. Other times I have even written a letter to the person who is making me feel so bad (but I NEVER send the letter). Then there are even times that I just start a flash fiction-type story based on this problem I'm experiencing.

What I have come to realize with stuff like this is that we can't force people to understand how they're making us feel unless they're ready.

However, we have complete control over how WE handle it in our own souls/hearts/minds. You're a writer, an artist, and this is your gift. Use it to your advantage. Channel this stuff into a creative outlet so that it doesn't eat you up so much.

Of course, your feelings won't totally go away but you will feel lighter and less burdened and better about yourself.

If you try writing about it, let us know (heck you can even post it here if you want!)

Good luck

Limebirdkate

[exiledstar]

Thanks.
It's a good idea. I don't know if I can do it.

[4amWriter]

Dec 29, 2011 11:40:15 GMT exiledstar said:

Thanks.
It's a good idea. I don't know if I can do it.

Well, at any rate, keep your chin up!